第十五节 不辨其灵而缔结爱之友谊，死后有害
446# 爱之友谊若与某人结成，而不辨其灵为何等人，死后乃是有害的。
所谓爱之友谊，是指内在的友谊；其情形是：人不仅爱对方的外在人，也爱其内在人，却不查验他在内在方面，即就灵而言究竟为何等人；也就是不查验其心思的情感为何：这些情感究竟是属对邻舍之爱、属对上帝之爱，因而能与天堂天使相联；还是属与邻舍相敌之爱、属与上帝相敌之爱，因而能与魔鬼相联。
这种友谊在许多人那里，因种种缘由、为种种目的而结成。它有别于外在的友谊；外在的友谊只关乎人的表面人格，并且因身体与感官的种种愉悦，以及各种利益往来而存在。这样的友谊可以同任何人建立，甚至可以同在权贵席前戏谑逗乐的术士相交。
后一种只称为友谊；前一种则称为爱之友谊。因为友谊是属世的结合，爱则是属灵的结合。
446# 爱的友谊是指内在友谊，内在友谊是这样：如果一个人被爱，不仅他的外在人被爱，而且他的内在人也被爱，却没有细查他的内在人或灵的真实品质，也就是说，没有细查他心智的情感，即这些是源于对邻之爱和对神之爱，因而适合与天上的天使联系在一起，还是源于反对邻舍的爱和反对神的爱，因而适合与魔鬼联系在一起。在许多情况下，这种友谊是出于各种原因，为了各种目的而缔结的。它不同于外在友谊，外在友谊只关注个人，是为了各种肉体和感官的快乐，以及各种方式的互动而存在的。这种友谊可以与任何人建立，甚至与在贵族或大人物的席上讲笑话的小丑建立。这种友谊被简单地称为友谊；但前一种友谊被称为爱的友谊，因为友谊是属世的结合，而爱是属灵的结合。
446. A Bond of Love That We Form with Others without Considering Their Spiritual Nature Is Damaging after Death
A "bond of love" is an inner friendship in which we love not only other people's outer selves but also their inner selves without investigating what their inner selves or spirits are like. We should investigate this to see whether the feelings in their minds relate to loving their neighbor and loving God and are therefore compatible with angels in heaven or whether they relate to forms of love that go against their neighbor and God and are therefore compatible with devils.
Many people form deep bonds of love like this, for a variety of reasons and purposes. This is different from friendship with someone's outer persona alone, which we develop for the sake of various physical and sensual pleasures and different types of social interaction. This second type of friendship can be formed with anyone, even with a jester who jokes around at a duke's table. I am calling this latter type of friendship simply "friendship" while the former type I am calling "a bond of love," because friendship is an earthly connection but love is a spiritual connection.
446. XV. A bosom friendship 1 contracted with a person without regard to his spiritual character is harmful after death.
A bosom friendship means one so intimate that it involves loving not only the friend's external man but also his internal man, and this without enquiry into what sort of a person he is inwardly or in spirit. This means without enquiring whether the affections of his mind derive from love towards the neighbour and love to God, and are thus capable of association with the angels of heaven; or whether they derive from love directed against the neighbour and love directed against God, so being capable of association with devils. Many people enter into such friendships for various reasons and for various purposes. This kind of friendship is to be distinguished from external friendship which is merely personal, and exists for the sake of various pleasures of the body and the senses, and for various kinds of contact. This personal sort of friendship can be contracted with anyone, even with the clown who plays the fool at a duke's table. This is simply called friendship, the other, bosom friendship; friendship is a link at the natural level, love a link at the spiritual level.
Footnotes:
1. The Latin phrase means literally 'a friendship of love'.
446. XV. A FRIENDSHIP OF LOVE, CONTRACTED WITH A MAN WITHOUT REGARD TO HIS SPIRITUAL QUALITY, IS DETRIMENTAL AFTER DEATH.
A friendship of love means interior friendship, which is such that not only is the man's external man loved but his internal also, and this without scrutiny into the quality of his internal or spirit, that is, into his mind's affections, as to whether these spring from love towards the neighbor and love to God, and are thus adapted to association with angels of heaven, or whether they spring from a love opposed to the neighbor and a love opposed to God, and are thus adapted to association with devils. Such friendship is contracted in many instances from various causes and for various purposes. It is distinct from external friendship, which relates only to the person and exists for the sake of various bodily and sensual delights, and for the sake of mutual interaction in various ways. This kind of friendship may be formed with anyone, even with the clown who jokes at the table of a nobleman. This is called friendship simply; but the former is called the friendship of love, because friendship is natural conjunction, while love is spiritual conjunction.
446. XV. THE FRIENDSHIP OF LOVE, 1 CONTRACTED WITH A PERSON WITHOUT REGARD TO HIS SPIRITUAL CHARACTER, IS DETRIMENTAL AFTER DEATH.
The friendship of love means interior friendship, which is such that not only is the external man, if a person, loved, but also his internal, without regard to the real nature of the internal man, or spirit; that is, without regard to the affections of his mind. These may be inspired by love towards the neighbor, and by love to God, and thus are capable of association with the angels of heaven; or they may arise from opposite loves, and thus are capable of association with devils. Such friendship is contracted by many from various causes, and for various ends. It is distinct from that external friendship which regards the person alone, and which exists for the pleasures of personal attraction as well as for various business reasons. This friendship may be formed with any one, even with a clown who cracks jokes at a great man's table. This is called simply friendship, but the other, the friendship of love; for mere friendship is a natural union, whereas love is a spiritual union.
Footnotes:
1. Note the distinction between the two forms of friendship which differ in kind, amicitia amoris and amicitia externa.
446. Quod Amicitia amoris ligata cum homine, qualiscunque est quoad spiritum, post mortem detrimentosa sit.
Per amicitiam amoris intelligitur interior amicitia, quae talis est, ut non modo ametur Externus ejus homo, sed etiam Internus, et hoc absque scrutinio qualis est quoad Internum seu spiritum, hoc est, quoad mentis affectiones, sive hae sint amoris erga proximum, ac amoris in Deum, ita consociabiles cum Angelis coeli; sive sint Amoris contra proximum ac amoris contra Deum, ita consociabiles cum Diabolis. Talis amicitia apud plures ligatur ex variis causis, et propter varios fines. Distinguitur haec 1 ab amicitia externa quae solius personae est, et datur propter varia jucunda corporis et sensuum, et propter varia commercia; haec amicitia cum unoquovis potest sociari, etiam cum hariolo qui ad mensam Ducis joculatur: haec vocatur simpliciter amicitia, illa autem amicitia amoris, quia amicitia est conjunctio naturalis, amor autem est conjunctio spiritualis.
Footnotes:
1. Prima editio: haee.